Nadia

My night was going okay and then the subject of my one sister came up.  She wants to get together soon and this upset me very very much.  She has become increasingly difficult to deal with and her boyfriend always has been.  The last time I saw her, she called me “Grimace”.  It took me many tears to let that go and thinking about seeing her again so soon just got to me.  I took comfort in pizza, but had already budgeted it earlier, so it was okay.  I just do not know why she gets to me so much.  I think part of it is because she does not even seem to be intending to get to me, and I think the other part of it is because she should very well know better.  In her mind, she has been “fat” and has through drastic measures to change that.  I do not think she was ever technically overweight, but she started cutting out pretty much everything-meat, vegetables, fruit, rice, flour, sugar, most dairy, so many things I can not even list.  So she eats only like beans and sugar free chocolates every day and takes all sorts of diet drugs and things.  I mean, she really has a bad mindset and probably should see a psychologist.  She is tiny and it is a terribly obvious eating disorder.  So, who is she to be calling me names?  :(  Grr.  I would like to just get over it, but it will just be a matter of weeks before I see her again, apparently.  There are so many issues I have against her-it goes way beyond mean names. 

I hate to say it, but at least I will have someone to picture as a target when I start kickboxing.  If I can get the aggression and animosity out there, perhaps I will not crumble to tears every time I see or think of her.