Nadia

I made a spelling mistake on my last entry and it is driving me crazy.  Is there any way to go back and edit it?  Aaaaahhhh(!)

Well, today I woke up feeling like garbage.  I had to get up early to get my rental and I had a terrible time falling asleep because I was afraid I would have nightmares of my car accident again and again.  Luckily, such was not the case.  Anyway, little sleep, early morning, et cetera.  My head was killing me and suddenly my neck hurts so much if I move my head.  I thought it might be from the way that I slept.  Got back from renting and thought there would be no way I would last seven hours until class and then class and then work, so I justified going back to sleep.  I am glad that I did, because I felt it did refresh me a bit.  I really could have used the time for a lot of things, but they all would have been at 50% anyway.   When I woke, though, my head and neck were still hurting.  I took some pain pills but to no avail.

I decided, to my chagrin, to skip kickboxing class.  I had already scheduled it out of my time at work and so, for some reason, I went to the movies.  I am a little mad at myself for this.  I really need the hours at work and told myself 1 movie for every 5 gym visits, but was only at 4.  It was not like a movie I really wanted to see or anything, and I was the only person in the 200-seat theater.  Anyway, I guess I just did not think I could handle a whole day at work.  I wanted my half day.  I justified it as I needed to relax.  ha.

 ”So convenient a thing it is to be a reasonable creature, since it enables one to find or make a reason for everything one has a mind to do.” ~Benjamin Franklin

Tomorrow, I am going to go to a doctor and get a second check on my head and make sure my neck is just a temporary pain.  I have lived a life of presuming things will work themselves out healthwise, but so much of my pay check goes to healthcase stuff, so I guess I might as well go even though it is still a $25 co-pay which seems pretty harsh.

I usually am pretty good with my money, but so many things came up out of nowhere this month.  Vet bill-$200, old dentist bill I did not realize I had-$300. YMCA membership renewal-$400, car rental-$300.  Seems like there was something else.  For someone who gets $300 a paycheck that really bites.  That does not include any of my medical bills and am really worried I will need the car rental for more than a week, and if I do not, I will need to get major repairs on the car.  It is very frustrating.  I can not stand going to my job more than I have to.  It is not like I am an exotic dancer or something, I just feel my job is very demeaning and soul-sucking.  Thank goodness for credit cards, I guess.

I hate when people do not say thank you.  I mean, they do not even have to mean it, just say it.  I do not mind, like, opening a door for someone and they do not say anything or little things like that.  But a few weeks ago, I made up a care package for a friend.  I mean, I went to the store and picked out certain things thinking of him and packed them all up and decorated the box and such and sent it away.  I was a bit concerned when we were chatting online about two weeks after sent that it had not gotten there.  So I just said, “Did you get my package?” and he was like, “Oh yeah, I did not open it yet”.  It has been another week and I have not heard anything from him.  All I wanted was a little “Thanks!” or “Aww” or “Get Lost” in an e-mail.  Is that really so much to ask?  I usually thank people for every little thing, so I guess bigger things I just kind of expect it.  Maybe it is a guy thing.  Kind of makes me less likely to do it again in the future for him or anyone else.